Everyman's Fantasy

After a scorching 12-4 start to the season, the fear that comes with high expectations is weighing heavy on my confidence. While everything seemed so clear last week, this certainly felt like a struggle. Is it something in the Rome air? Is it the pizza and gelato coma I've been in for three days? Regardless, like the gladiators who performed only a few kilometers away, I soldier on, determined to slay Vegas.

As always, home team in caps and spreads courtesy of 5dimes.



Tom Nelson Underdog That Wins Outright:
DETROIT (+7) over Washington- Washington hits rock bottom when it loses outright to the resident rock bottom dwellers Detroit Lions! There, I said it. It's on paper. And the delete key won't work, so let's move on.
Season: 1-0

“You Can Put It On the Board!” Lock of the Week:
NY Giants (-7) over TAMPA BAY- The NFL: Home to the transitive property. Tampa Bay lost to Dallas by 13. Dallas lost to New York Giants by 2. Tampa Bay loses to New York by 15 (or at least more than 7).
Season: 0-1

PHILADELPHIA (-9.5) over Kansas City- Come see a former Houston Cougar battle a quarterback who never took a college snap! Welcome to the UFL, err, NFL.

HOUSTON (-3.5) over Jacksonville- Both Houston and Jacksonville are more than willing to give up 30 points to their opponents. Houston is capable of scoring 30 points. Jacksonville is not. That makes this pick easy.

Cleveland (-14) over BALTIMORE- When #2 and #32 in your power rankings meet, the spread should be this big. But, for some odd reason, this....just...seems...too....high.

Atlanta (+4.5) over New England- Matt Ryan is turning into pre-2007 Tom Brady. He may not put up the biggest numbers, but he makes plays when he needs to, doesn't turn the ball over, and most importantly, he wins. Atlanta keeps it close, and may even pull off the upset.

Green Bay (-7) over ST. LOUIS- The Rams lost to a team that I've now predicted to lose to the Detroit Lions. Greatest Show on Turf, where art thou?

NY JETS (-1.5) over Tennessee- Feels like a perfect trap game, with Tennessee absolutely needing a win and the Jets riding high after defeating the Pats. But...I can't get the image of the Titans defense absolutely self-destructing against Houston. Jets really start putting pressure on the rest of the AFC East by moving to 3-0.

New Orleans (-5.5) over BUFFALO- One thing I wouldn't do when I play New Orleans: Run a hurry up offense. Giving the ball back to Drew Brees and company as quickly as possible seems like a very, very bad idea. Which Bills defensive lineman choke slams Dick Jauron first?

CINCINNATI (+3.5) over Pittsburgh- Pittsburgh doesn't beat anyone by more than three points. In fact, they don't even beat teams like Chicago anymore.

OAKLAND (+1) over Denver- Ask yourself this: Is Denver good enough to be 3-0? If you're not laughing out loud, then you don't know football.

ARIZONA (-1.5) over Indianapolis - Both quarterbacks have two legitimate MVP's (Peyton's 2009 award ranks up there with Karl Malone in MVP travesties) and one Super Bowl ring. One quarterback has Anquan Boldin as his second wideout. The other has Pierre Garcon.

Carolina (+9) over DALLAS- Jerry Jones would do anything to avoid going 0-2 in his new billion dollar digs. Like hanging the scoreboard too low. Wait, that wasn't a way to cheat, it was just a huge oversight? My bad. Meanwhile, Tony Romo is working hard to supplant Jake Delhomme as the NFL's most efficient turnover machine.

San Francisco (+7.5) over MINNESOTA- What odds would Vegas have given you during the preseason that this game would feature two undefeated teams? 20-1? 50-1? 100-1? One team emerges unscathed, and I have sneaky suspicion that it could be the Niners. I'm not quite ballsy enough to make the moneyline bet, but I would take the points.

SEATTLE (+1) over Chicago- This week's worst matchup features two teams who don't do anything well. If the game ends 0-0, then Seattle covers!

Last week: 12-4
Season: 12-4